Somewhere between an inherently anxious disposition, a tendency to fall asleep during Savasana, and a proclivity for Old Fashioneds, I try to follow Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop in hopes of being more, well, goopy.
That doesn’t mean I’m totally balls to the wall. I pick and choose what to practice; vegan chickpea “tuna” salad, yes; jade eggs, no.
I want to operate on a higher plane of peace and mindfulness… but keep my feet on the ground.
Goop’s in-house clothing line, G. Label, seemed like a speedy shortcut to finding serenity — the Concorde jet of higher planes if you will.
The vegan mayonnaise and daily Tracy Anderson videos can be paused, because all you need to play is a $145 t-shirt from G. Label… right?
Let’s investigate in this review of G. Label’s Jordan t-shirt.
G.LABEL CLOTHING SIZING
I’m 5’5.75”, weigh between 115-117 lbs, and am ~32A or an XS in bralettes.
My G. Label Jordan t-shirt is a size small.
According to the tag the size small converts to a FR 38/US Small/IT 42
Boxy in the body with a closer cut towards the bust, size small was the right choice — despite my dress size being a FR 36.
This Lauren blazer is a size US 2.
This blazer is longer than a standard blazer, but I dig that.
The shoulders are right in line with mine and there’s a little bit of space for a light sweater underneath.
My Jasmine dress is a size US 2.
It’s a perfect fit… and one of my absolute favourite dresses.
The flutter sleeves and collar are flattering for any shape, while the buttons up the side let you decide how much leg to show and it’s not ridiculously long.
In 100% silk, the Jasmine dress is luxurious and luscious (I can’t believe I’m describing a dress as “luscious”)… it’s low-key and relaxed at the same time and perfect for any occasion.
These Seamus trousers are a size US 2.
At 5’5.75”, these trousers are MASSIVELY LONG.
Why do brands make all their trousers & jeans for 5’11” models, when the average height for women worldwide is 5’3”???
Other than the massive length, they will look a lot better when they (eventually) get hemmed — see?
My Torres sweatshirt is a size extra small.
… and it’s definitely extra small.
I should have taken my usual G. Label top size.
It’s tough to get over my head, pinches under my arms, and, IMO, looks a little too small on me.
PSA: The Torres sweatshirt is lined in fleece and I’m not big on fleece tbh.
Since the Jordan t-shirt is 70% cotton and 30% linen, you have to be careful. When Goop says it’s a “light-as-air cotton-linen slub,” they mean it is even lighter than your mind after a wellness retreat. It’s a skin-tone-bra-will-lightly-show kind of lightness.
Avoid rattan chairs where it could get caught on a stray stick and don’t let your dog jump on you in it.
It’s a no-expenses spared dry clean only, made in Italy kind of luxe t-shirt.
… and when you consider that Rag & Bone’s t-shirts are $95, quality t-shirts are just (unfortunately) expensive these days.
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Was G. Label’s Jordan t-shirt the boarding pass for the higher plane?
The one where you have perfectly toned arms, are zen when things don’t go your way, where you don’t wear makeup because your inner glow shines brighter than any highlighter… Basically, a life where you go to the Farmer’s Market and don’t accidentally let half the produce go bad in the back of your fridge.
Yes and no.
I still need to practice yoga, I still need to deal with frustrations, and my skincare routine still needs to be five steps long…
But what a simple $145 t-shirt offers is the encouragement to try.
Maybe it’s because I don’t want to feel like a dope for spending $145 on a linen blend t-shirt and not at least try to be more balanced…
… or maybe it’s simply because the higher plane feels more reachable when a polyester blend t-shirt isn’t weighing you down.
Side note: The Outnet carries G. Label, so you can always find it on sale there…
PROS & CONS
–Natural Fibers: With a 70% cotton and 30% linen blend, this t-shirt feels light as air.
–Cute Capped Sleeves: The puff-sleeves offer a certain femininity without being too cutesy.
–Dry Clean Only: I tried hand washing and it shrunk, so, uhhh, yeah, dry clean only.
–Price: It’s not as expensive as a t-shirt from Tom Ford or even from The Row… but no matter if you fly private or commercial, objectively speaking, $145 is still kind of crazy for a white t-shirt.
This G. Label review probably appears pretentious or worse, simply sounds stupid.
“Get off your high horse. Just wear the damn thing and shut up. It’s all marketing anyways.”
… and that’s the thing, with fashion especially, it’s how it makes you feel.
So if you can swing it and you feel like it, why not dress for the
job lifestyle you want?
If you can’t wait for a sale, you can save money and the environment by buying pieces secondhand on The Real Real, also you can get an extra $25 off your first purchase.
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